Improbable Research

From The Guardian:

The strange case of the homosexual necrophiliac duck pushed out the boundaries of knowledge in a rather improbable way when it was recorded by Dutch researcher Kees Moeliker.

It may have ruffled a few feathers, but it earned him the coveted Ig Nobel prize for biology awarded for improbable research, and next week he will be recounting his findings to UK audiences on the Ig Nobel tour.

Ducks behave pretty badly, it seems. It is not so much that up to one in 10 of mallard couples are homosexual – no one would raise an eyebrow in the liberal Netherlands – but they regularly indulge in “attempted rape flights” when they pursue other ducks with a view to forcible mating. “Rape is a normal reproductive strategy in mallards,” explains Mr Moeliker.

As he recounts in his seminal paper, The first case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard anas platyrhynchos, he was in his office in the Natuurmuseum Rotterdam, when he was alerted by a bang to the fact a bird had crashed into the glass facade of the building. “I went downstairs immediately to see if the window was damaged, and saw a drake mallard (anas platyrhynchos) lying motionless on its belly in the sand, two metres outside the facade. The unfortunate duck apparently had hit the building in full flight at a height of about three metres from the ground. Next to the obviously dead duck, another male mallard (in full adult plumage without any visible traces of moult) was present. He forcibly picked into the back, the base of the bill and mostly into the back of the head of the dead mallard for about two minutes, then mounted the corpse and started to copulate, with great force, almost continuously picking the side of the head.

“Rather startled, I watched this scene from close quarters behind the window until 19.10 hours during which time (75 minutes) I made some photographs and the mallard almost continuously copulated his dead congener. He dismounted only twice, stayed near the dead duck and picked the neck and the side of the head before mounting again. The first break (at 18.29 hours) lasted three minutes and the second break (at 18.45 hours) lasted less than a minute. At 19.12 hours, I disturbed this cruel scene. The necrophilic mallard only reluctantly left his ‘mate’: when I had approached him to about five metres, he did not fly away but simply walked off a few metres, weakly uttering a series of two-note ‘raeb-raeb’ calls (the ‘conversation-call’ of Lorentz 1953). I secured the dead duck and left the museum at 19.25 hours. The mallard was still present at the site, calling ‘raeb-raeb’ and apparently looking for his victim (who, by then, was in the freezer).”

Mr Moeliker suggests the pair were engaged in a rape flight attempt. “When one died the other one just went for it and didn’t get any negative feedback – well, didn’t get any feedback,” he said.

His findings have provoked a lot of interest – especially in Britain for some reason – but no other recorded cases of duck necrophilia. However, Mr Moeliker was informed of an American case involving a squirrel and a dead partner, although in this case it is not known whether the necrophilia observed was homosexual or not as the victim had been run over by a truck shortly before the incident.

Another quiet few days

Not much happened over the weekend, spent a lot of time helping out with the Elmcroft Associates website.

Other than that, didn’t get near the computer at the weekend. Plenty of stuff to catch up on…

Viral Marketing Manifesto

From Scoble.

1) Make sure the “brand” you’re building in people’s heads matches what you actually want people to think about.

2) To have something go viral, you actually need to do something that will make people talk. Games that are fun are generally good, but won’t work for all products. With Honda their “cog ad” for the Accord went viral and that was only a video.

3) Be sensitive to the leading “connectors” — they’ll be the ones who’ll really kick off your viral campaign. Convince them to link and you’re really on your way. Know who the connectors are in the communities you want to reach. Want a political community to talk to you? Glenn Reynolds. Gadget freaks? Engadget or Gizmodo. Tech Geeks? Dave Winer, Boing Boing, MetaFilter, or Slashdot. Etc.

4) Test the campaign with 40 leading connectors before embarrassing yourselves. Listen to the feedback you get.

5) Make sure that the viral thing matches the image you’re trying to build. A VW ad (not commissioned by VW) went viral, but because it used a terrorist blowing himself up it didn’t match the image that VW was trying to build for itself.

6) A good test is whether employees like it or not. These things can be used to increase morale. “Look at my cool company, they even have cool viral campaigns.” But, they can decimate morale too. “What a lame campaign.” Be careful here. Ask coworkers if they would be proud of sending this to mom.

7) A good viral campaign lets those who talk about it manipulate the campaign. If it is designed to manipulate those who are talking about it, be wary. We hate being manipulated, but we love to manipulate. Translation: can I add something to the campaign? Even a comment of my own? If it’s a game, does it listen to me, like the Subservient Chicken does?

8) Be wary of doing fake blogs. That gets bloggers fur to curl up. You might get away with it (ILoveBees, for instance, did) but if done poorly you’ll just get derided for your fake campaign. Be especially wary when what you’re advertising is actually real-life stuff. Search engines and blogs, for instance, need campaigns that accentuate the image of “reliable, trustworthy, always up, relevant to real life, etc.”

FT.com: Why executives should steer clear of the blogosphere

URL. As linked to by Buzz Marketing with Blogs by Travis Smith.

Why executives should steer clear of the blogosphere
By Lucy Kellaway
Published: February 28 2005 02:00 | Last updated: February 28 2005 02:00

The chief executive of a US company recently put a question to his board. Why was it, he asked, that so few of his 5,000 employees took the blindest bit of notice of the memos, videos and voicemail messages with which he continuously bombarded them? And why was it, he asked again, that anything remotely secret whipped around the entire company before you could say Jack Knife?

They pondered this uncomfortable truth for a while and decided on an experiment. They would start “rumours” by word of mouth, warning the person they tipped off to keep their lips zipped. Sure enough, the “secret” information was known by the entire company instantaneously.

The trouble with this ingenious trick is that you can only pull it off once. The thought behind it is so cynical that if the workforce found out what was happening, trust (which is pretty fragile in most companies anyway) would be blown forever.

This CEO’s problem is one that affects all executives. Employees don’t want to listen to what they are saying – mainly because they communicate too much and most of it is too boring.

But now there is a new way that executives can reach not only their internal audience but the world at large – through the blog, or web diary.

According to an article in this month’s Fast Company magazine titled “Exec meets Blog. Exec falls in love”, this is a trend with legs. What better than a chatty letter a couple of times a week saying what is going through the boss’s mind? A gift, surely. The great thing about blogs is that people actually read them.

To introduce you to the form, I will start with Randy’s Journal, the outpourings of Randy Baseler, vice-president at Boeing.

“It’s always an exciting time when we roll out a new airplane, because it doesn’t happen all that often in our industry. And it’s an especially exciting time for our employees because they’re the ones who build these fabulous airplanes,” he writes in his latest entry.

Randy is new to the blogosphere, and I’m afraid it shows. The point of blogs is that they are personal and fun to read; his is a tarted-up press release. Randy battles on: “Meantime, there’s some really cool stuff coming up this year with the 777-200LR.” Evidently someone has told him that groovy people read blogs and he must alter his prose accordingly. This was bad advice. The result is a case of Dad at the disco.

More promising is the blog of Rich Marcello, senior vice-president of Hewlett-Packard. At least he has got the idea that a blog should contain personal reflections. A day or so before his boss, Carly Fiorina, got the boot, he was musing thus: “Last week was a good week and it reminded me of something I’ve believed for a long time – we are all Michelangelos. Sometimes we don’t like to call what we do artistic and we certainly are much too humble to equate ourselves to Michelangelos, but I believe it’s true.”

To test this novel theory, I seized a Biro and a scrap of paper and sketched the back of my good friend Michael Skapinker’s head and, as it happened to be his 50th birthday that day, I gave him the picture as a gift. “My head isn’t that shape,” he said, frowning. “Do you think I’m like Michelangelo?” I asked. No reply.

Back to Rich’s blog. The following week he had something to write about. His boss had been sacked. “So what was the reaction to Carly’s departure internally?” he asks in his blog. Answer: “It varied.” He says that he was a Carly fan but that she didn’t execute her vision quickly enough, which doesn’t get us much further.

Rather than tell us anything interesting he quotes a line from ee cummings about how difficult it is to be oneself. His conclusion: “No matter what you believe about Carly during her tenure at HP – friend or foe – I think you will agree she would have gotten along well with ee cummings.”

As it happens, I think Carly F would have eaten ee cummings for breakfast. Either way, the question of how the sacked executive would have got on with the overrated poet is not a pressing one.

A third sort of executive blog gives authors a chance to air their opinions on world affairs in a self-serving fashion. This is how Richard Edelman, chief executive of the PR company named after him, describes the recent Larry Summers foot-in-mouth episode where the Harvard president enraged some academics with remarks about the under-representation of women in science and engineering: “The Harvard controversy pains me deeply. I have three daughters and an accomplished wife. In fact, my eldest will be going to Harvard in the fall. I also know Larry Summers, not well but well enough. He is a decent man, a serious intellectual . . . ”

This entry bangs on and on. Alas, no one is listening. When I looked it had been on the site for a week and had attracted not one comment. But at least Mr Edelman invites comments. Neither the HP nor the Boeing blogs do, which is typical of the bad old ways of executive communication. It is the age-old message: I talk and you listen.

And now, finally, the executive who does get blogging. He is Bob Lutz, vice-chairman of General Motors. To me his blogs are excruciatingly boring because they are all about models of cars. What isn’t boring, though, is the way he does it. He defends his new Saab as if he means it, but then invites comments. On the same day 20 longish replies were posted – many of them critical. All there on the GM website for anyone to read.

The point about blogs is risk. If they are made risky in any way – either through publishing negative comments, or because the author is honest about themselves or their business, people will take notice. If they are merely another conduit for sanitised corporate information, or exercises in executive vanity, they will go the way of the corporate mags, the voicemails and the company spam. lucy.kellaway@ft.com

Travis makes the following comment, amongst others:

She starts with a long introduction about how rumors spread through a company, then says that blogs by executives can spread information as widely and quickly.

She says traditional communication fails because executives are boring. Actually, I’ve often found executives to be extremely interesting. Even if they’re a little less than scintilating, they certainly have a lot of interesting news to talk about. However, the ones I’ve known usually feel that knowledge is power. What’s changed, I think, with blogs, is that shared knowledge can help build personal power still.